South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
