just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
