After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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