forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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