You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
