And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
