She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
