fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
