I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize