I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
