if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize