I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
