A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
