Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
