don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
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