My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
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