He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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