how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Everything about him screamed your future.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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