The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
