I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
