porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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