how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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