Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
There r osticjed everywhere
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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