I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
