I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
