Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
