He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
