You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
