i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
