I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
