Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
