Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I can't turn off my feet"
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
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