i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
