Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
