You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Randomize
