how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
