wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
