Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize