After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
