Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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