dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize