lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Randomize
