so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
