...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
