All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
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