Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
