Nicole vs. Life
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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