He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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