I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
