and you said cock pushups were impossible
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
