GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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